Let’s face it: the Christian life is meant to be lived in a community. We are, in fact, encouraged, challenged, and sanctified through our personal relationships with other believers. In fact, many Christians might feel isolated and a bit unsure about how they should properly connect with their peers.
Maybe you had a wonderful community in college through a Christian campus ministry, and now you have a hard time connecting with an established group and adhering to a new community. Or, maybe you’re surrounded by people who are at a completely different life stage, and it feels like you can’t really fit into the community next to you. Whatever the circumstances dictate, here are some ways to find your own people!
Join a church
This could seem a bit obvious, but joining as well as investing in a church is quite important when it comes to building a Christian community. I’ve often heard young adults lament to the overall lack of community they dealt with post-college, while also fondly reminiscing about their experience with a campus ministry.
A common thread seems to be the fact that they either didn’t join a church since college, or they are not invested in the church they did join. Churches are, in fact, the primary way the Christian community organizes itself.
If you find a Bible-believing church in your own city, with pastors who wisely and faithfully preach the Word, you should join it, then invest in it. The remainder of this list also provides a few ideas for how to do that.
Invite people over for dinner
Well, we discovered that one of the best ways to get to know someone is to invite them into our own home and share a meal together (or just dessert). Food is, in fact, a fairly universal way to bond with someone.
While everyone might not be super interested in joining you for a hike or going to a concert, everyone needs to eat, and most people love doing it with others. Being married is not necessarily a requirement for this particular type of hospitality.
We even have a friend who, as a single man, constantly invited other single people, couples, as well as families, into his home for meals. His intentionality helped him build many lasting friendships.
It also helped him find a wonderful wife, and now they constantly invite others into their home together. You can simply volunteer to take a meal to someone else’s home, especially if you have more flexibility than they do.
In fact, we have some friends who, as married people without children, often ask families with children if they could simply bring pizza over for dinner, so it would be easier for everyone to enjoy it. Well, you can only imagine no one ever turned them down!
Serve
As many churches have paid staff, different ministries of the church mainly function through members who willingly volunteer their time and energy. Most ministries involve serving with other members and provide a wonderful way to build relationships.
Serving in the nursery and offering help is a great way to build relationships. Serving in the nursery is the first example. Nothing bonds a community like cleaning up an exploding diaper, or even trying to wrangle a herd of 2-year-olds and their Cheerios around a table for some quality snack time.
Moreover, caring for someone’s children to allow them to worship in peace will make them instantly predisposed to like you more. That’s a fact! If kids aren’t your thing, there are many other ways to serve.
You can sign up to take a meal to a family in need. Even become a greeter. You can join the worship team. Whatever your interests and gifts are, there is somewhere for you to serve the church.
Introduce yourself to brand new people you notice at church
As you start building community, make sure you set yourself up for success. Try to seek out others who are also looking for community. For example, people who are new to a church generally fit this category.
When you notice new visitors, just greet them after the service and introduce yourself. Don’t be afraid to make new friends, be bold, and ask them if they want to grab a bite with you. If they aren’t available, then set something up for a future date.
Right after graduating from college, I remember moving to a suburb of Philadelphia. The first Sunday, we decided to visit a church, where a man introduced himself right after the service.
He told us a little bit about his family and the church, and then invited us over for dinner the next weekend. We went, met his wife and daughter, and we’ve been close ever since. If you are blessed enough to receive such an occasion, don’t hesitate to take it!
Join a small group
The vast majority of churches have some form of small groups that meet on a weekly basis. Whether they are simply called community groups, life groups, or covenant groups, they are generally a wonderful way to build relationships with other believers.
Even if each church might have its own spin on how they’re supposed to work, the main idea is to gather in someone’s home and study the Scripture and pray together. The common interest in studying the Word and growing closer to our Lord happens to provide a miraculous foundation for developing meaningful personal relationships with other members of your church.
Follow up on prayer requests
If you are made aware of a prayer request, whether someone asks you specifically or you hear it during a small gathering, there are two ways to follow up on it. First, pray for the request. It’s a given that praying for others helps us care for them better, to become invested in their lives, and exercise our faith on their behalf.
Second, make sure you check in with the person to see if it turned out well. For instance, if someone in your small group asks you to pray for an upcoming family gathering or even work meeting that they have been anxious about, note when the event will take place, and remember to ask the person afterwards if it went well.
They will definitely appreciate your concern, and most likely want to reciprocate by praying for you. There’s really no better way to start a friendship with someone than praying for one another!
Go to Sunday school
Well, not all churches offer Sunday school, but if yours does, you should take advantage of it. There are some churches out there that organize Sunday school by age or even life stages, while others do so by topics.
Either way, it’s a wonderful opportunity to meet people in a small, informal setting. Sunday school classes can also put you in contact with people who aren’t in your small group, allowing you to broaden your connections within the church.
Even if you don’t meet your best friend in Sunday school, we can definitely benefit from additional time studying the Bible. Of course, we also want to mention that this list is merely a list of suggestions. You’ll have to be graceful and patient with the outcome.
If you found this article useful, we also recommend checking: What Does the Bible Say About Alcohol?
